I
don’t think that has anything to do with U of O, I think it’s just bc I
like going to college and being on my own and not being in a place
that’s dark all the time for like 2/3 of the year— I’m not depressed
doesn’t mean I’m happy (although I am- but it’s because I’m at college
not bc the college I’m at is all that great) U of O, well, the quality
of education is OK and my fellow students fucking suck. not all of them
of course, but california people! what the fuck! they are all the same,
they are all annoying in various ways, I never knew a stereotype could
be so true- so so stupid?? (class today- wow I didn’t know people were
that stupid??? how are they in college????) I am not intelligent by any
means but it’s like these people don’t even try. how did they even make
it here? and worse, it doesn’t make the school look very good when it’s
full of these dumb fuck california clones who only care about when the
football game is and where their next drink is coming from. but hey,
football is the only thing that this school cares about anyways. going
to school here, it’s like highschool 2.0- same thing but w more booze.
socially, it feels more clique-y and stupid than my highschool ever did.
I wish I could start over. I almost wish that I hadn’t made so many good friends, so I could ditch this place actually. it is not that great, but I absolutely cannot tell my parents that and if I try to explain it, well… if only if only I had not been so fucking stupid and had gotten the scholarship, this is NOT worth what my parents are paying for me and I cannot stand the thought of their money (which they think is getting me a decent education) funding football and other useless unrelated shit.
I don’t know how to fix this, I’m finally figuring out what I want but I don’t know how to make it happen.
(I wish I could talk to my dad but I can never tell him that I don’t love it here he would be so hurt)
help???
wrote this forever ago, still applies (except for the fact that I have spent most of the last term being completely fucking miserable)
I wish I could start over. I almost wish that I hadn’t made so many good friends, so I could ditch this place actually. it is not that great, but I absolutely cannot tell my parents that and if I try to explain it, well… if only if only I had not been so fucking stupid and had gotten the scholarship, this is NOT worth what my parents are paying for me and I cannot stand the thought of their money (which they think is getting me a decent education) funding football and other useless unrelated shit.
I don’t know how to fix this, I’m finally figuring out what I want but I don’t know how to make it happen.
(I wish I could talk to my dad but I can never tell him that I don’t love it here he would be so hurt)
help???
wrote this forever ago, still applies (except for the fact that I have spent most of the last term being completely fucking miserable)
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